Nokkrar staðreyndir um Chuck Norris.

- Chuck Norris is responsible for China's over-population. He hosted a Karate tournament in Beijing and all women within 1,000 miles became pregnant instantly

- Simply by pulling on both ends, Chuck Norris can stretch diamonds back into coal.

- When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.

- A high tide means Chuck Norris is flying over your coast. The tide is caused by God pissing his pants.

- In a recent survey it was discovered the 94% of American women lost their virginity to Chuck Norris. The other 6% were incredibly fat or ugly.

- Chuck Norris invented a language that incorporates karate and roundhouse kicks. So next time Chuck Norris is kicking your ass, don’t be offended or hurt, he may be just trying to tell you he likes your hat.

- The easiest way to determine Chuck Norris' age is to cut him in half and count the rings.

- Chuck Norris does not own a house. He walks into random houses and people move.

- Chuck Norris is the only person to ever win a staring contest against Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder at the same time.

- Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.

- Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

- Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.

- Chuck Norris gave Mona Lisa that smile.

- Jesus can walk on water, but Chuck Norris can walk on Jesus.

- A man once asked Chuck Norris if his real name is "Charles". Chuck Norris did not respond, he simply stared at him until he exploded.

- There is no such thing as a lesbian, just a woman who has never met Chuck Norris.

- Kenny G is allowed to live because Chuck Norris doesn't kill women.

- Chuck Norris uses Tabasco Sauce for eye drops.

- Chuck Norris could shoot someone and still have time to roundhouse kick him in the face before the bullet hit.

- Chuck Norris can hold his breathe for nine years.

- Chuck Norris can watch an episode of 60 minutes in 22 seconds.

- The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Chuck Norris out. It failed miserably.

- In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself.